HAVING CONFIDENCE IN WHAT YOU DO

I’ve been feeling inspired to write about something related to this topic for a while. At first, I wanted to title this idea “My Short Term vs. My Long Term Goals” and write about what keeps me motivated to heave towards my aspirations. However, last weekend made me realize that everything that I want to achieve involves confidence. This is something that I’ve been struggling with from time to time, as well as many others who may be too humble to admit. There are many things that I have thoughts of doing and going after, but I won’t be able to accomplish them if I’m not confident with what I have.

Since I originally thought of naming this post about goals, I’ll start off with some of my long term ones. One of the things that I aspire long term is to be a role model and a mentor to others. I’m not saying that I eventually see myself becoming a “perfect” representation of what people seek to be. I know the struggles that I went through to be where I currently am, and I continuously reflect on my journey towards becoming a better version of myself. What I strive to be as a mentor and a leader is an inspiration. Even now, when I have others coming to me for advice, I feel like I don't deserve the right to provide personal insight because I'm still in the process of establishing myself. Perhaps we as individuals often tend to underestimate our potential. I just feel so honored to be able to have that opportunity to inspire someone.

"Leadership is not about titles, positions or flow charts. It's about one life influencing another."

- John C. Maxwell

Someone recently asked me, “Would you rather be feared or loved?” I know that there are some leaders who abuse their power and eventually cause others to fear them. These people may see that they earn better respect by drawing the fine line between them and their subordinates. On the other hand, there are leaders who embrace their knowledge and privilege and use that to help others grow. Knowing me, you can tell that I would prefer the love side of this equation. I feel that you earn the most genuine respect through compassion. Now tying this in with confidence, I see those who are willing to reach out a helping hand have more confidence than those who want to keep the valuable knowledge to themselves. Yes, you do have to be a bit selfish, but overdoing it would wind you up in a lonely and fabricated world with others who also want to use you to climb the ladder. Some who are reading this may completely disagree with me, but this is just my opinion. Generous people seem to be more happy and confident with themselves. It is tough knowing that others who learn from you might have the potential of gaining your knowledge and becoming more knowledgable than you. However, you most likely won't be dealing with this person in five years time. So, let them have their lime light and continue to kill everyone else out there with your kindness.

I’ve been asking some of my friends how they measure their time - day by day, week by week, or month by month. Interestingly, most of my guy friends answered with “day by day,” while most of my girl friends answered with one of the latter. I measure my time week by week, and that’s actually how I keep myself motivated. So, my short term goals would just usually be weekend activities. I know it sounds silly - weekend activities are goals? Well for example, if I started off my Monday on the wrong foot, I know that I would have something coming up on Saturday to look forward to. That determination for the weekend to come is my goal, which is why I stated in one of my previous posts that I am someone who constantly needs something going on in my life. These free flowing activities are what motivates me to persevere through my working weeks. Even if I started my Monday with smooth and radiant skin, I am able to end my week in celebration.

Another one of my short term goals is my blog. I don't expect it to become popular or famous like other blogs out there; It's not easy coming up with ideas that would drive interest, but I understood over time that this blog is a place for me to express who I am - not to please an audience. Sharing my blog posts also takes an ounce of confidence that I have to throw out there as well. If you ask my best friend, she can tell you all about the anxiety I have before sharing some of my Monday posts. What if people don't agree with my ideas? What if people think that I put myself out there too much? What if people think I'm bragging? To be honest, these fears still dwell in the back of my mind, but I know that sharing my creativity is a passion of mine. In order to continue growing and learning, I need to put myself out there.

There will always be people who look down on you and want to destroy what you do. Unfortunately, jealousy and hatred exists, and it's not a feeling that we can really control. On the bright side, there are also people who look up to you and strive to be in juxtaposition of where you are. Staying confident above all the negativity is a difficult thing to do, but something that keeps me steering ahead is this fact: I will be in a different and better place five years from now. I could probably say this because I'm still young and have opportunities. However, these negative vibes hit me a little more personally, especially since I am still young and am working towards establishing myself. It's a mystery how some people could turn hostile towards you overnight, but having confidence in what you do will only get you one step ahead of the game.